Like A Boy
by MrsTColfer
Summary: Kurt needs to get it out, even if it means Noah really doesn't care about him... Crappy Summary... R & R


**AN: Just a little fic inspired by a song. I'm gonna blame my sister and mom for listening to Ciara's 'Like A Boy' more times then I can count on a recent trip. Not Beta'd, all mistakes are mine. This is my first Glee story so please be nice... Enjoy. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Glee or the song is just for fun, no profit. **

**REVIEWS ARE LOVE!**

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><p>If Kurt were being honest he would tell you that there was only one thing he hated about his boyfriend. His boyfriend of the past seven months was such a <em>boy<em>.

Now Kurt was unquestionably gay, so it wasn't the fact that Noah had a penis, but the fact that he _thought_ with it.

Kurt loved Noah, but he felt like suck a naive girl in their relationship. He stayed home, barley going out with friends while Puck went out all the time. He waited for calls, and set all their dates, only to blown off . Noah couldn't be damned to be a little more caring or considerate and Kurt was sick of it.

That's where this week Glee assignment came into play. Mr. Schue had told the group to find a song with lyrics that express something they'd be to scared to say any other way. Enlisting Brittany and Santana as his back up, Kurt stood before his group of friends. His usual put together look had been replaced with a tight muscle shirt and low ridding, baggy, camo pants.

"Okay Kurt when ever you're ready. The floor is yours." A smiling Will Schuester sat on a chair beside Tina and Mike.

"Thank you Mr. Schue. Before I start I want to explain this song selection." Nervously Kurt looked over the room of people, his eyes stopping on his boyfriend. Noah sat looking at the brunet for a moment before looking away to his phone. "This song is for Noah, I guess it sums up how I feel right now."

Without looking back at his boy friend Kurt stood in place with the two Ex-Cheerios, the music starting.

_Pull up your pants  
><strong>(Just Like Em')<strong>  
>Take out the trash<br>**(Just Like Em')**  
>getting ya cash like em'<br>Fast like em'  
>Girl you wanna act like ya dig<br>**(What I'm talkin' bout')**  
>Security codes on everything<br>Vibrate so your phone don't ever ring  
><strong>(Joint Account)<strong>  
>And another one he don't know about.<em>

Standing with his hands on the mic stand Kurt stared into Noah's eyes. Mercedes, Finn, Rachel and even his two back up singers glared at Puck while he sang.

_Wish we could switch up the roles  
>And I could be that...<br>Tell you I love you  
>But when you call I never get back<br>Would you ask them questions like me?...  
>Like where you be at?<br>__Cause I'm out 4 in the morning  
>On the corner rolling<br>Doing my own thing  
><em>_**Oh**_

Using his hands to accentuate the hook of the song, Kurt poured his emotions out. His eyes flickering in thanks to Mr. Schue for giving him this opportunity to get this out.

_What if I?...  
>Had a thing on the side?<br>Made ya cry?  
>Would the rules change up?...<br>Or would they still apply?...  
>If I played you like a toy?...<br>Sometimes I wish I could act like a boy._

He want everyone to stop looking at him after that line. He knew he was more feminine then any of the other guys at the school. He clothes were always perfect and he used more moisturizer and makeup then some of the girls did. His nicknames consisted of Girl Face, Porcelain, and Princess. He secretly would have given that all up if it meant that people didn't see him as such a girl. If Noah didn't see him as such a girl.

**Can't be getting mad!**  
>What You Mad?<br>Can't Handle that!  
><strong>Can't be getting mad!<strong>  
>What you mad?<br>Can't handle that!

_Girl go head and be...  
><strong>(Just Like Em')<strong>  
>Go run the streets<br>**(Just Like Em')**  
>come home late say sleep like em'<br>Creep like em'  
>Front with ya friends<br>Act hard when you're with em' like em'  
><strong>(What)<strong>  
>Keep a straight face when ya tell a lie<br>Always keep an air-tight alibi  
><strong>(Keep Him In The Dark)<strong>  
>What he don't know won't break his heart<em>

Closing his eyes Kurt sang, moving the mic stand with him. He let these people, his only real friend see this part of him he hid. Every lyrics seemed to hit him, the words expressing how he felt. He grabbed the mic from the stand and got ready for the next part.

If I was always gone  
>With the sun getting home<br>**(Would Ya Like That?)**  
>Told you I was with my crew<br>When I knew it wasn't true  
><strong>(Would Ya Like That?)<strong>  
>If I act like you<br>Walk A mile off in yo shoes  
><strong>(Would Ya Like That?)<strong>  
>I'm messing with your head again<br>Dose of your own medicine

He walked around the room as he sang, looking at Noah as he went. His boys face was colored with a rare blush as he watched his boy move and listened to the words. Kurt danced with Mike and Sam as Brittany and Santana sang the next part.

_**Can't be getting mad!  
>What You Mad?<br>Can't Handle that!  
>Can't be getting mad!<br>What you mad?  
>Can't handle that!<br>Can't be getting mad!  
>What you mad?<br>Can't handle that!  
>Can't be getting mad!<br>What you mad?  
>Can't handle that!<strong>_

If I played you...  
>Would yo like that?<br>Had friends...  
>Would you like that?<br>never call?  
>Would you like that?<br>Hell naw  
>You wouldn't like that<br>**No!**

Stopping in front of Noah, Kurt leaned into quietly sing in his ear. A single tear finally falling down his check as he pushed away from Puck and stood back at his stand for the end.

_What if I made ya cry!_  
><em>Would they still apply?<em>  
><em>What if I...<em>  
><em>If I played you like a toy<em>  
><em>Sometimes I wish I could act like a boy...<em>

Panting slightly in center of the room, Sam Brittany on his left and Santana and Mike to his right. He smiled and thanked everyone for watching before picking up his bag and leaving. Santana and Mercedes close behind him.

The girls glaring at each other before realizing Kurt would need both of them right now. They wrapped their arms around him, steering him into the girls bathroom and letting him cry.

"Why am I so stupid? He wants me for sex and I let him use me, 'cause I'm fucking in love with him!" Kurt sobbed into Santana's chest as Mercedes rubbed his back slowly.

"It'll be okay, baby boy, and if not Imma have to fuck up that boy."

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><p>Back in the choir room Puck sat with his head in his hands as Quinn and Brittany took turns yelling at him. He had thought of just turning them out but he knew he deserved it.<p>

"Puck you really are an ass. You're not going to get your man back sitting here." Looking over at Sam Noah sighed.

"How did I fuck up so bad? He never told me he wasn't happy, and I was to scarred to give into my... feelings." Quinn looked over to the boy and scoffed. "I mean it Quinn! I can't show him how I feel. I was taught that love didn't exist just because my ma couldn't keep a man. I don't deserve someone like him."

"Then go after him! Go into that bathroom and tell him why you act like you do!" Quinn yelled, pausing to look toward the door. Looking back at Puck she smirked "Well that's if you can get past Santana and Mercedes."

Biting his lip Puck stood and walked out of the room with out looking back. He walked down the hall way of the school he loved, stopping when he heard soft sobs and whispered words of comfort.

The girls bathroom door was open and when he poked his head in he could see Kurt rest on Santana and Mercedes behind him.

His heart clenched at the sight of the small boy in the girls arms. Kurt was a shaking, sobbing, and heart broken mess.

"I just want him to love me even half as much an I love him." That choked out line was all it took for Puck to step fully into the bathroom. His (hopefully still) boyfriend looked up and whipped his eyes. "What do you want Noah?"

The girls seemed torn between comforting the tiny brunet and attacking Puck. "I just want to talk babe. Call off your girls, I just want a moment, and if you never want to see me again after... Well I'll leave without a fuss."

After a moment of hesitation Kurt waved the girls off, shifting to the floor so that he wasn't in Santana's lap. Said cheerleader pushing Puck into the wall as she walked by. "Hurt him more Noah Puckerman and I'll rip your balls off."

Taking the words to heart Puck walked over to the sitting boy and sat beside him. "You must hate me, I must be the worlds worst boyfriend."

"No, I love you. Even though I should hate you, you're abusive and it's unhealthy, but I love you." Kurt's voice was so weak; tired. "I should want to leave you, and find someone who actually loves me... But I can't."

Pulling the small boy to him Puck cursed himself. The boy in his arms was so sm_all_; his ribs sticking out and his collarbone cutting across his chest. Kurt's hair was a mess, and his eyes were surrounded in thick purple circles. How did he not notice that his boyfriend had stopped eating? That he was always tired and that he seemed to have given up? How could he be, well, such a _boy?_

"I do love you Kurt, more then you know. I love you but I'm scared. I don't know how to love someone. You know that my dad left when I was young, and my mother drilled it into my head love isn't real... I want to love you but I can't." Puck held the frail boy closer, whispering into his hair. "I hide being scared in avoiding the problem, hiding the feelings, but I just ended up hurting you."

Kurt, for his part, stayed silent, and after a moment Puck continued. "You are so good love. You are so strong, and loyal. I never wanted to be good, or change, for any one before. And if I only wanted you for sex I wouldn't be here right now. You move me, and you make me feel so good." Pausing again he sighed, inhaling the sweet shampoo Kurt used.

"You let me in baby. You let me love you, and let me know you. I love you Kurt. I love you and it scares me. I love you and it's killing me to know that I hurt you. I love you and I hate knowing you're hurting yourself over me." Ending the speech with a soft sob into dark hair Puck cried.

"I love you too Noah. And I understand why you hurt me, and I understand you might now be perfect. But please, be with me like we were before. Take me out for supper, study and train with me, hold me after sex." Shifting so that he cold hold Noah close Kurt went on. "I need you to understand that I don't care. I don't care you don't think you can love me. Just try. **Please.**"

Nodding against Kurt hair Noah kissed the top of his head. "I can try." Tilting the boys face up he kissed him. Soft and gentle. No rush, just love.

"That's all I ask."


End file.
